Parents often find themselves frustrated, repeating phrases like ‘Just pay attention,’ ‘Just do your homework,’ or ‘Just stop.’ However, these oversimplifications fall short of addressing the underlying challenges. ‘Just Pay Attention’ Fails: Real solutions for ADHD and Executive Dysfunction go beyond quick fixes, tackling the deeper issues that make these directives ineffective.
The Nike commercial slogan, ‘Just Do It’ did wonders for selling sneakers in the late 1980s, but it just doesn’t apply to adults and kids with ADHD or executive dysfunction.
Imagine how wonderful the world would be if everyone could overcome their deficiencies by just doing it. We would live in a utopia. Parents wouldn’t need to be homework cops. Executive functioning coaches would be rendered obsolete as the line of perfect children marches into mind-numbingly mechanical adulthood where “to err” wouldn’t exist. While you briefly ponder the ridiculous impossibility of living in that Twilight Zone, I will land the plane in Reality.
Medications and cognitive behavior therapy (CBT) can significantly help to address the behaviors contributing to executive dysfunction at home and in the classroom. However, there is no miracle drug or magic therapist.
Meds and CBT only work in conjunction with a multimodal approach that includes specific goals to address the deficiency with a viable solution. Each goal needs targeted objectives that clear a tangible pathway to mitigate the unsystematic manner in which tasks are (or are not) attempted. Without a scientifically researched based approach, the endless hamster wheel of kids staring at blank computer screens, playing endless video games, or staring into an “iPhone abyss” will persist. In the meantime, those pesky alerts from the school will continue to pop up on your devices consistently.
When our generation of Gen-Xers was in school and didn’t do their homework, the teachers actually had to call home (if they were so inclined), or the report card would bring the bad news. There wasn’t email, and there certainly wasn’t Aspen, Schoology, PowerSchool, etc. These days, parents have their arguments digitally packaged for them – usually arriving after school hours, just in time to “duke it out” in another episode of Homework Wars, Part 568.
Don’t fret, though – there is a way around the chaos. Specialists like myself can create and implement the aforementioned solutions and game plans. That’s where my years of training and experiences lie.
Combined with my methodologies, I often collaborate with clinicians in related fields. I collect or review the data, isolate the problem, whether it be time-management, disorganization, or general procrastination, and then scaffold a tangible solution. While I don’t believe in coincidences, I think that every procrastinator suffers from more than just laziness. “Lazy” is (literally and figuratively) a four-letter word to label behavior that hasn’t been adequately identified or accepted. Don’t grab the low-hanging fruit that makes it easier to call your child “lazy.”
Rainy Sunday mornings can be construed as “lazy” days, but the pervasive nature of executive dysfunction is more complicated.
Unfortunately, the problem doesn’t just go away and doesn’t always correlate with the momentum of adolescent maturity. Although there is a solution, there are not any quick fixes. The work I do takes time. Building relationships with my students is an exercise in persistence and patience for the parents and their children.
That said, I subscribe to the philosophy that right action leads to right thinking, and it’s my job to help those who struggle to find the formula for the proverbial path to success. Just doing it is not the answer. As much as your child swears that their backpack full of crumpled paper and incomplete tasks on Google Classroom is part of a systemic approach, know there is an easier, softer way.
